Friday, January 23, 2009

What do you want to be when you grow up?

That question is and has been a hard one for me to answer. I think it's my one hang up in all my life. I have so many interests that it has been hard for me to ever precisely answer that question. This morning on the radio station that I listen to they were talking about how things have influenced your career choices in life. They were asking if we have had video games around long enough to really help children decide that they want to be something particular. The one dj mentioned that his son plays the wii guitar hero and now wants to take real guitar lessons. They were also talking about tv shows that might have had an influence. I remember watching the tv show "Quincy". For those of you not familiar with this show, think of a 70's version of "CSI" without the special affects. Quincy was a criminal pathologist. I remember loving that show and wanting to be able to figure out all of these crimes based on science. Quincy was a middle-aged man who had had various relationships in his life and lived on a boat in Los Angeles, California. He had good friends and hung out at one his friend's restaurant a lot. He was quirky and was a pioneer in his field. I was maybe 12 or 13 when this show was on television and I remember telling many people that is what I wanted to be.
Unfortunately, I remember a lot of people poo-poohing my idea. They reminded me that it was television and not real life. They reminded me that it would take a lot of schooling and money to do something like that. I remember feeling really dashed that no one really thought I could do it. As I look back on my life, I see that there really wasn't a lot of support for me in any career choice. My dad wanted me to join the military to get my education. I, however, felt that I had already been in the military just by growing up with him! ha. The military was not for me. I was not of that mind-set. I didn't even enjoy Boy Scouts for heaven's sake! What I really loved was music and marching band and drama and all the entertaining you could provide. I was even discouraged from those, however, because I was told I would never make any money.
So, here I am, sadly, many years later and I'm not making much money and doing something any joe-blow on the street could do. OK, I'm not "blaming" any of those in my past for my choices, they were mine, but I also know that what adults think when you are a young person really does matter. You can either make or break someone. Unfortunately, I was broken and I listened. What frustrates me the most about it all is that I am usually the one who does not listen to those voices, yet in this case I did. I enjoyed college and loved being exposed to all the many things that it offered. I never could settle for one course. I was like a kid in a candy store at college. There were all of these interesting things to learn and I wanted to know it all. Finally I had to graduate and move on with my life, so I settled for a degree in Communications. A very generic degree, yes.
So, what's my point? My point is, that every time I have an opportunity to talk to a young person about what they want to do when they grow up, I suggest they do what they have a passion for doing. Forget the notion that you won't make enough money. My belief is that you will be happy and that constitutes success. So, you may not be a millionaire, but you'll be happy and will more than likely be able to provide nicely for yourself and your family. I remember running into a friend of ours who had teenagers at the time. Her son came over as we were chatting. In the course of our conversation he mentioned that he loved art and wanted to be an artist. His mother immediately jumped on him and said he would never make money at that. My instincts rose up in me and I told him to do what made him happy. There was more to being an artist than living in poverty in a rundown apartment in Paris. There were many ways to be an artist. So, what is this young man doing now? Well, he never went to college or any sort of school after high school and he has jumped from one low paying job to another - none of which have had anything to do with art. He has worked at Wal-mart and various factories. So, whether or not his mother's discouragement really aided in his choices, it certainly didn't help. Too many people have the idea that they want their children to be "better" than they are or were and in some ways that is a nice idea, however, give them a chance to grow into what they want to be. Expose them to all sorts of things in their young lives. Give them choices and they will eventually find their niche. I have a neice who is very artistic and she loves to draw and color. She's not very old, but those talents can become anything as she grows. Sometimes we just need someone to believe in us and offer encouragement.
So, what did I become when I grew up? I'll get back to you on that one - when I grow up!

1 comment:

Cherie and Jeff said...

We sure love you at home. As far as I am concerned you are the best husband, son, Uncle and Papi in the world. I appreciate you so much. There isn't a day in my life I don't thank Heavenly Father for the greatest blessing in my life. YOU!!!! Thanks for all you do and for the many great examples you give to me.
I sure love ya.
Your wife...
Cherie